No Chill

I was driving my daughter home from school the other day, chatting about anything and everything as we do. Neither of us has been diagnosed with ADHD, but no one has yet accused us of linear thinking either. So as the topics bounced around like ping pong balls, I was suddenly smacked in the face with “Mom, if I got hurt at school, would the ambulance come for me? How would they tell you?”

This is not the most difficult question I’ve been asked by a child (not even top ten), so I tell her that the school would call me, and I would come. On further reflection, I elaborate – “They would call me, and I would immediately jump in my van. and come screaming like a wild ape – ‘SOPHIE!!!!! SOPHIEEEEEEEEE!!!!!” I emphasize this statement by pantomiming my best impression of the arms-straight, crazed-face Cruella-drive. You know the one …

She laughed, I laughed… and then I hear her sweet voice say, “Yeah, and Mimi would come screaming too”. Her Mimi (my mom) lives nextdoor to us, and I found myself laughing again, but also suddenly misty-eyed. “Yeah, your Mimi would for sure come too… How lucky you are to be loved by not just one, but two people with absolutely *no* chill!” She laughed again, and we pulled into the driveway, back into the craziness that is this season of life.

But I kept thinking about what she said. About how my mom would have also come screaming, no hesitation, at the mere mention of one of her grand-babies in pain. I thought about all the times she’s coming screeching to my side, for problems big and small. I thought about how often I’ve taken that love for granted, rolled my eyes, asked her to “please calm down” and accused her of drama.

I thought about how I’d never sat down, hugged her, and told her thank you, for loving me like that. That I never had to wonder if she’d be there for me – heck, sometimes I had to worry that she’d be there too much. And I thought about how incredibly lucky I am, to be loved with “no chill”.

In the gospel of Luke, Jesus tells the story of the prodigal son. As a quick recap, a son gets rather full of himself and decides his dad is holding him back from the finer things in life. So he demands his inheritance early, then takes his money and runs. Shockingly, this doesn’t work out too well for him. He squanders his money and ends up eating from a pig trough, the lowest of low points for a Jewish aristocrat. He realizes while his dad obviously can’t forgive his arrogance and sins, maybe he’ll have mercy on him and let him work as a servant. So he practices his speech and heads home. The scripture then says:

²⁰ So he set out and came to his father. But when he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion for him, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. ²¹ And the son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and in your sight; I am no longer worthy to be called your son.’ ²² But the father said to his slaves, ‘Quickly bring out the best robe and put it on him, and put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet; ²³ and bring the fattened calf, slaughter it, and let’s eat and celebrate; ²⁴ for this son of mine was dead and has come to life again; he was lost and has been found.’ And they began to celebrate.”

Luke 15:20-24

Does this sound like a man with “chill” to you? He runs (not walks) to his son, hugs (and kisses) him, and doesn’t even let him finish his apology before hurrying the servants to find him beautiful clothes to wear. While he’s at it, he makes sure everyone gets ready for a party. He’s so incredibly excited his son is home. He doesn’t care about his sins, his past, his self-recrimination… He just loves his son. No Chill. At all.

But this is what got me. That father? The one in the story without chill?

Christ is using this parable to paint a picture of our Heavenly Father. Of His love for you and I, lost sinners, when we turn from our sin and dare to come home. The God in heaven, who set the stars in place and the planets spinning?

He doesn’t need your speeches, He isn’t waiting for you to do better, be more, be less. He just wants you to come home to Him.

Because He loves you. Without chill.

This truth has me in awe. I could ponder it for ages and still struggle to comprehend it. To believe that, when I am hurt, wounded, helpless, in my lowest lows, He comes hurtling for me, shouting my name. Ready to love and heal and mend everything that’s broken.

I hope that love heals your heart like it has mine, time and time again. And that God gives us the faith to believe in it, no matter what life throws our way.

With love.

Kelsey