A Squish Baby & A New Direction

“If life was any sweeter, I’d be a pot of honey”- Winnie the Pooh

I was thinking about how on earth to come back after almost a year away and describe to you the beauty that is mine these days…

But let me just show you instead:

I know I promised a birth story, but honestly guys – there isn’t much of one to tell! I went into labor a week early after weeks of modified bed rest (10/10 do not recommend) and he was born in less than two hours 😱 I had been considering a home-birth- (I didn’t want to give birth by myself … wearing a mask… in the same unit I had delivered Sam. Can anyone say “trauma”? 😬😂) & I’m glad I had the midwife’s number on speed dial, because I didn’t believe it was real labor until 45 minutes before he was born. Oops. But besides his speedy entrance, that’s the story. It’s the most miraculously boring birth story, which was *exactly* what I prayed for. Thank you, Jesus.

Cameron is a squish. A delightful, stubborn squish. He ate every 2 hours for the first 4 months of his life – that was super fun. Then he has decided to become mobile at 6 months, crawling at 7, and is now cruising at 8. He is so focused on exploring everything, and considers roadblocks and corrections as new challenges to overcome. We just laugh- and cry a little bit. And I still nurse him once before bed every night, mostly so I can rub his delicious arms, caress his chipmunk cheeks and sit in the wonder of finally having this sweet miracle in my arms.

Life is good.

So a new direction… As I’m watching my children grow before my eyes, I’ve started to live in this practically panicked-state of needing to drink it all in. I found myself obsessively taking pictures, making Facebook and Instagram posts to help memorize these moments, living with my phone in my hand so I can document and freeze this time. But the more I did that, the more I found myself using my phone for other things, getting pulled into tangents. I’m quickly realizing that social media, for me, was causing me to live my life through a lens. Instead of looking at my kids, I’m looking at my phone. And I realized, with a sick feeling in my gut, that if this continues, they’re going to grow up thinking they come in second to a screen.

And I’m not okay with that.

So I’ve decided to delete my social media & regular email for the summer – maybe longer? Depends if I can find a better balance. I’m going to use this blog for life updates for family and friends & send out a monthly email maybe. I’m even going to buy a good, old-fashioned point and shoot to take pictures. Imagine that 😂 I figure I can check texts and emails twice a day and not miss anything urgent. Nothing more urgent than being a present, peaceful mom for my kids anyways.

I’m not making any political statements here. Nor am I saying every mom needs to do this! Let’s be abundantly clear – social media was my place of healing, solice, comfort and community during my little year of horrors in 2018. And the way it allowed me to share my Sam’s journey- you’ll never find me jumping on the “delete all social media” train. It’s a powerful, amazing tool.

It’s just not the one for me right now. ❤️

Okay guys, enough rambling. I just wanted to prepare you for the more day-to-day nature of my content coming up. And also say a big ole’ thank you for your patience with me for the past three years. Your encouragement and comments, questions – I love it all. I hope this space still holds something valuable for you.

With love,

Kelsey